Most of us dream about a life without problems. We not only dream about it, but work diligently to get to that magical place where we can just sit back, relax, and finally enjoy life. There is one big issue… there are always more problems.
The frustration that we feel as we encounter problem after problem can consume us leaving us disappointed with life and thinking of ourselves as failures. Instead of clinging to a false ideal… that we will solve all of our problems and sail off into the sunset with a drink in our hand… it’s worth rethinking the difficulties that we continuously encounter in life. We can start by noting a few truths that, when embraced, can free us from the futile attempt to avoid or eliminate all difficulties in life.
First, life itself, if you had to define it, would have to include problems. The human experience, simply put, includes difficulties. We grow physically, mentally, and emotionally when we run into adverse events, take them on, and successfully overcome them. A life without problems would be no life at all.
Second, there will always be more problems. We often trick ourselves into thinking that our path to a life of ease is just on the other side of the battle we are currently fighting. But a new set of problems is around the corner when the current problems get solved. Comedian Gilda Radner wrote a book before her death, aptly called It’s Always Something. The sooner we accept the fact that it’s always going to be something, the sooner we will free ourselves from being so surprised by, and bummed out by, ongoing obstacles.
The third truth about problems is that they often act as stepping stones to get us where we want and need to be. As life unfolds, our next level of success is often just on the other side of the very thing we think will prevent us from getting there. Author Ryan Holiday says it well in his book, The Obstacle Is the Way, “What stands in the way becomes the way.” If you look back on your life, it is often the failed endeavor, the loss, or the misstep, that ultimately led you to something special, something better. Had you never had the adversity, you would not be where you are today.
A muscle only gets bigger and stronger when it gets resistance, gets challenged, and gets broken down. Obstacles lead to opportunities, and it helps to see the obstacle not as a problem, but as just that… an opportunity. Viewing all adversity as only problematic, and continuing to be surprised that problems keep coming, leads to a life of stress and despair. Eckert Tolle says that “”Stress is caused by being ‘here’ but wanting to be ‘there.’” Life is more stressful if your ‘there’ involves no problems, because it simply does not exist. And our ‘here’ will always involve difficulties, surprises, and obstacles, and the sooner we accept those as a part of normal, everyday life the more peace we will experience.
We’ve all heard the saying… if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. One way to look at life’s never-ending problems is… if you can’t avoid ‘em, embrace ‘em. To think there will be no problems is unrealistic, and to complain about ongoing problems is futile, but to meet your problems head on and overcome them makes you stronger, tougher, and wiser. If you want out of a problem, solve it. Just be ready for the next problem, because it’s coming. And don’t be discouraged because all great things in your life came as a result of overcoming problems. So, don’t expect problem-free living. There is no such thing. Embrace problem-solving living instead.
